Ringing out the year

I have so many things I want to write about today! Reading, the end of this seemingly endless year, the deer that visited our front yard overnight while we slept…

Let’s start there, with the deer.

I took this photo thinking it would be a Wordless Wednesday post here on the blog. Then I got up this morning and wrote it into my #frontstooppoetry for the day. So, words, which means not wordless.

My husband and I saw this in the snow when we opened the gate from our side yard to head out to the sidewalk for our first walk of the day yesterday.

#frontstooppoetry by Kim Kishbaugh
Who were you? / Doe, fawn or buck / who nibbled from the lilac / and left this / single hoof print / in the snow? (Dec. 31, 2020)

A single deer had walked right into the branches of our front-yard lilac tree, and from there we couldn’t tell where it had gone. Right on through? Maybe, but the tracks on the other side were definitely a rabbit’s. Either a rabbit obscured deer tracks, or the deer backed out the way it came. We could see only about three hoof prints, so it’s possible this deer used the sidewalk and veered into our yard only for a quick snack. I’ve seen it happen in the daylight. I know lots of people consider deer pests; to me, they’re graceful and beautiful creatures, with whom I’m generally happy to share a garden. It brightened my day to know I had hosted one in the wee hours.

Reading out the year

Lots of my friends are tallying up the books they’ve read this year and sharing the numbers on social media. Not me. I’ve found reading difficult this year. Oftentimes I’ve found myself too anxious to focus on reading anything longer than a poem, and for a short while leading up to and following Election Day, I couldn’t even read poetry. As a friend said to me recently, my relationship with books has been a troubled one. On the bright side, I’ve actually read more poetry books than usual this year. Among the ones I finished the year with was The Abridged History of Rainfall, by Jay Hopler (McSweeney’s Press), which is absolutely super. One poem in it, Elegy for the Living, is so heartbreakingly beautiful that I was compelled to read it aloud for the Twitterverse:

My unread book pile grew the other day when a friend emailed to ask if he had loaned me a book that he couldn’t find. He had not, but I’m pretty sure I own the book, and I thought, “If I can find it and have already read it, I can just pass it along to him”—an elegant solution to get him the book he wanted and clear one object out of my too-cluttered life, don’t you think?

You can probably tell already that this didn’t work out as planned.

I, too, found that I couldn’t track down this book, which for all I know might have decided to take a forbidden vacation with its sibling of the same name from my friend’s book collection.

But in the process of looking for it, I came across three other books that I had forgotten I had and really do want to read: two murder mysteries and Joe Biden’s book about the death of his son Beau, Promise Me, Dad. So those vaulted directly to the top of my next-read pile. The good news is that I’ve just finished reading one of them. Care to guess which one?

As we’re counting down the days to Inauguration Day 2021, and I’m looking forward to change in the White House—and, I hope, the country—it seemed appropriate to end 2020 with Biden’s memoir. I took the rediscovery of this book as a sign that the time was right to get to know my next president a little better. I’m glad I did. Although, of course, I cried at the end. So be forewarned.

Next up is one of the murder mysteries, a little lightness to start the new year.

My husband’s political advent calendar

Speaking of lightness, the new year, and the countdown to Inauguration Day…over on Escape into Life my husband, renowned cartoonist Phil Maish, has created a post-Christmas advent calendar to count down the last days of the current White House administration. Each day he opens a new door to show a new cartoon. Day 25 will be Inauguration Day.

Here’s yesterday’s cartoon, the most recent as I’m typing this but probably not the most recent as you’re reading. So here’s the growing archive of all open doors.

Ending the year on a high note

After the overnight snowstorm that revealed the deer tracks yesterday morning, we had an utterly gorgeous day today, sunny and clear and crisp. The husband and I took a nice walk, to and through a neighborhood park, and I couldn’t resist taking a few photos, including the one at the top of this post. It was a simply perfect winter day; I couldn’t have asked for a better one to end 2020. We’ll be spending our New Year’s Eve the way we like best: watching Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers movies and trying to stay awake until midnight. Tomorrow’s lentil soup is already made, and the traditional Swedish rice pudding will follow it up; if I recall correctly, we started 2020 without either of those good-luck staples, and look where that got us.

#frontstooppoetry by Kim Kishbaugh - Winter Storm Morning
It felt rather good / to shovel off all the crap / of 2020 (Dec. 30, 2020)

Recipes new and old

Today I’m reading cookbooks. I’m inspired by having just spent the last two weeks working my way through a fine book of food writing: The Reporter’s Kitchen: Essays by Jane Kramer. It doesn’t usually take me two weeks to read a book, but one of the hallmarks of good food writing is that I savor it rather than gobble it up voraciously.

I nibbled The Reporter’s Kitchen a chapter at a time, pausing often to menu plan, cook, bake, and borrow and read cookbooks. I have three borrowed cookbooks on Hoopla as a result, along with a list of dishes from Kramer’s own repertoire that I’m planning to find recipes for and try. Among these:

  • Parsnip and pear puree
  • Indian cornbread
  • Braised red cabbage

Those are all fall/winter foods, so it will be some time before I give them a try. In the meantime, I’ve been finding and experimenting with other new recipes, while also pulling out some of my standby favorites. My husband and I have feasted on all manner of simple delights in the last couple of weeks, including sautéed spinach both with and without pine nuts; pasta in many varieties, most often including grape and cherry tomatoes sautéed just long enough to start to wilt; pub burgers with mushrooms and black olives; fish with whatever seasonings seemed right; sesame noodles; a lovely salad of green beans, cucumbers and basil with lemon vinaigrette; slaws both new and old; apple cake; derby chocolate chip cookies; and no-bake peanut butter cookies.

Mom’s kitchen

Those no-bake peanut butter cookies

I’m working on (as in eating) some of those peanut butter cookies now, which means I’m thinking about my mother. This was one of her recipes, and I suspect it came from a peanut butter jar because I’ve come across at least one other person who was raised on exactly this same cookie but didn’t have the recipe from his mother and asked for mine. It’s dead simple with just six ingredients, and it’s the only cookie I make all summer long because…no baking. As I associate this with my mother, I suspect that my son and probably his friends will associate it with me.

Food traditions are a comfort to me. My mother’s and grandmother’s recipes call them to my mind, and recipes handed to me by friends never cease to summon memories of those friends when I make them. Holidays for me are interchangeable with the food I eat to celebrate them, and I think I would sooner skip Christmas entirely than celebrate it without my family’s traditional Swedish-based meal.

In general, my tastes in food differ vastly from my mother’s. I was raised on a diet of meat, potatoes, and vegetables cooked well beyond an inch of their lives. Aside from the vegetables, my mother was an excellent cook. But my adult tastes lean more toward pastas, rice, lighter (or no) meats, and steamed or grilled vegetables. I’ve inherited or retained my mother’s taste for fish, though, along with memories of standing next to her fishing along a riverbed. I’ve also inherited those recipes, some of which—her lentil soup, for example—I will enjoy till my dying day.

Hungry reading

I just started reading a book of food writing, and all I can think about is food. I’ve only an introduction and one essay into The Reporter’s Kitchen, by Jane Kramer, and already I’ve made chicken salad, am planning dinner, and have borrowed two cookbooks from my library (thank you, Hoopla!).

Kramer is The New Yorker‘s European correspondent, but what’s important here is that she also has written about food over the years. The Reporter’s Kitchen is a compilation of those essays. I read The New Yorker only irregularly and wasn’t familiar with Kramer’s writing before this book caught my eye at the library (you know, back in the day when libraries were buildings you could walk into). So far I’m a fan. Even Kramer’s introductory essay had me starting to think about ingredients in my kitchen, and that might be the best response possible to food writing.

Tonight’s menu will take shape around some sort of pasta with tomatoes, kalamata olives, and probably green beans. I’m thinking about sautéed spinach on the side, and I also have an urge to bake. That’s as far as I’ve gotten.

Ground to table

I’m looking forward to a summer and fall filled with great cooking made possible by garden-fresh ingredients from the brand-spankin-new raised bed my husband just built for me. It’s 16 feet long and will hold everything from tomatoes and beans to cabbage and kalettes (aka kale sprouts). We took delivery of 4 cubic feet of soil this week and have spent the last three days moving it wheelbarrow by wheelbarrow into its new wood-framed home. I’m tired and a bit sore, but oh so happy I could write a poem.

Mineral-black soil,
Fertile, dark promise rich with
possibility

Or something like that. I’m reading a lot of poetry while sheltering in place, particularly after treating myself to a birthday purchase of books delivered direct to my door not by Amazon but by the distributor(s) for my local independent bookstore, which is able to continue bringing in income with this service while not able to open its doors. My order included three books of poetry, and I’m making my way through them slowly, savoring and re-reading.

My current obsession is The Madness Vase, by Andrea Gibson, one of my favorite poets. These poems are powerfully strong, anthems of survival shot through with vulnerability. They celebrate life without ever pulling punches, and I can’t get enough of them. That has been pretty much the case for me with every book of Gibson’s poetry I’ve ever picked up, and if you’ve never read any … well, I think you’re missing out.

I’ve seen Gibson in performance as well, and they’re equally powerful on stage. Here’s a collection of videos of their performances—don’t miss.

Non-fiction for the birds

Also included in my bookstore purchase was an enormous hardcover book, What It’s Like to Be a Bird, by David Allen Sibley. This one, too, is a joy, not meant to be read cover to cover but intended rather for wanderlust reading, choosing your own topic and following it wherever it takes you.

One place It took me was to my drawing pad, after reading about wings inspired to draw feathers of all varieties. I sense years of enjoyment ahead of me from this book, reading and re-reading, learning about different aspects of birds’ lives, reminding myself how and why they fascinate me.

Spring is a good time for reading about birds, when I also can sit on my front porch or back deck and watch them in the trees and at the feeders. That’s where I’m headed now, probably with a book.

Ruminating on a peaceful morn

Books and poetry and a long-ago vacation

Reading is a temporal affair, isn’t it? Temporal in the sense of time, not place. The reader’s mind connects with the writer’s and, as with conversation, time matters. What I think today will be different from what I think tomorrow; what interests me changes from moment to moment, even more so from day to day or month to month. So whether a book grabs me (or a poem or essay) is as much about my own mind space while reading as it is about the quality of the writing. Nick Hornby used to make that point regularly in his “Stuff I’ve Been Reading” columns; he wouldn’t write about books he put down or didn’t like because he knew that he was part of the reading equation and didn’t think it fair to criticize the author.

This morning I pulled two small books of William Blake poems out of my bookcase, books that I apparently picked up in a Bangor, Maine, book store on vacation years ago (maybe 10?). They must have really resonated with me at the time—I bought two, after all—but rereading Songs of Innocence and Songs of Experience over my morning coffee today left me ready for something else. A couple of pieces resonated, but nothing that would have moved me to buy the book. (To be fair, I suspect it was Blake’s Selected Poems that moved me more in that Bangor bookstore. I’ll probably look through it later today to see how I respond.)

What did move me today was a piece shared on Escape into Life’s Facebook page: a therapist’s advice turned into poetry: “An Anarchist Quaker’s Prayer to Soothe Anxiety.” I’m also reading a lot of Billy Collins and Maya Angelou and Mary Oliver these days. Is anyone else having trouble settling into a novel or non-fiction book? I don’t seem to have the focus for even the best novel these days, probably a result of underlying anxiety that I’m not much noticing otherwise. Poetry generally seems to be where my head is right now.

RIP Bookmarc’s

Finding the bookmark from Maine made me look up the bookstore to see how it’s doing these days. I’m sorry to report that Bookmarc’s went out of business a couple years back when its owner (unsurprisingly named…Marc) decided to retire. Its website is gone, but the Bangor Daily News informs me that Marc was planning to set up a booth in a local antique market, so I’m hopeful his longtime patrons are still able to find him.

I’m always sad to see an independent bookstore close down. I’ve spent many joyful hours of discovery in small bookstores all over the country, and they are among my favorite places—right up there with libraries. I can peruse tables and shelves happily in any bookstore, but a shop whose owners and staff offer recommendations and favorites and mini-reviews is a special treasure. I’m pleased to report that my community has several independent bookstores, both large and small. I have a favorite, but you might find me in any of them.

On Memory Lane

That Bookmarc’s bookmark has me remembering that lovely trip to Maine—the only time I’ve been there, and believe me I want to go back. What I remember most are the lighthouses, the oddest little Airbnb we’ve ever stayed at (but absolutely enjoyed—it came with farm-fresh eggs stocked in our little refrigerator every day!), fresh air and family hikes, lobster and blueberry pie, and the discovery of blueberry beer. All happy memories, and I might be inspired to dig up some of the photos later today to share in a separate post.

First, though, my report on yesterday, with lots of photos.

Goals, photos of the day

Yesterday was almost a lost day for personal achievement. I was so very tired, worked a full day on two hours’ sleep, and probably came close to achieving none of my personal goals. I saved it, though, by deciding I needed at least a short walk before bed. Two miles later, I arrived back home after a trip through our local park that I realized I needed because it had been a couple of weeks since I was in any kind of green space. I had my camera with me, and photo-a-day turned into several shots I’m not embarrassed to share. The park was restorative, restful, beautiful, and just what I needed. My goals today:

  • Letter to a friend, not just a postcard
  • Create something
  • Cleaning and laundry
  • Photo a day
  • Dog walk, weather permitting
  • A nice dinner, ordered in, with my husband and maybe some friends (virtually, of course)

And here are those photos. It was wet in the park between rain showers, and the tree branches and buds and berries glistened in the light. I really can’t decide what shots I like best. (Bonus shot of Tank at the bottom.)

Reading and writing in isolation

Also, Spring!

Reading…

I recorded and shared my first #InternationalPoetryCircle poem yesterday. I chose a poem from the book I’m reading currently, Mary Oliver’s Dream Work, which I think I bought during my last trip to the bookstore—back when I didn’t know how long it would be before I could return again. I pre-ordered a book that day, and I regret that I didn’t get in to pick it up in the week or so between when it was released and when I started social distancing in earnest.

Now, I miss my library and book store terribly, even while I have an enormous pile of unread books at home. To be honest, I have several large piles, scattered throughout the house.

If there are silver linings to our current situation—and I believe we have to look for silver linings because they help stave off despair—surely one of them is the imperative to read some of these unread books. I’m first working my way through the handful of library books I had at home when the library closed down. Then I plan to tap into my own lending library, a.k.a. those piles of books.

Debbie Downer here: This squirrel carcass showed up on the roof outside my home office window yesterday. It’s mostly flat but appeared from nowhere. Explanation? Dropped by a predator? Froze on a higher roof and fell off? It’s a mystery at my house.

In between poems I’ve just started Doris Lessing’s The Cleft, one of my library books. It’s a faux history that in its early pages has raised fascinating questions about the origins of men vs. women. Think of a time when only one gender existed, and the other suddenly appeared, and that’s where Lessing’s book starts. The Christian tale of creation tells us man was created first, and woman from him, but Lessing posits the opposite and explores what might have been the thoughts and feelings of women and men when the second gender appeared.

I’ve just started the book, really, so that’s all I have to offer at this point, except tp say I’m intrigued and have enjoyed Lessing’s work before so am eager to spend more time with this tale.

…and writing

I’ve started a couple of poems during this isolation, and published one (Pi Day, over at Headline Poetry & Press), but this blog has prompted, and houses, the bulk of what I’ve written outside of work. I’m starting a new project, though, to write postcards or letters to the people I care about. I read yesterday that the Post Office is under serious threat of being closed down by summer with so little mail being sent out because of COVID-19. We need the Post Office to help keep us connected always, and to support mail-in voting both for the remaining spring primaries and in November if this pandemic lingers as I fear it will. So I’m seizing the opportunity to reconnect with loved ones both near and far. That leads me, of course, to today’s goals, as this will be one of them.

Goal setting

First, my performance on yesterday’s goals:

  • Photo of the day—check
  • Read poetry—check
  • Record a poem to share with others—check
  • Dog walk and exercise walk—check
  • This blog post—check
  • Figure out if I need to go to the Post Office to purchase stamps—check
  • Dinner with friends via FaceTime if I’m able to quit work on time—worked late
  • Check the status of my seed order—check(ed) and reordered

Today? More modest:

  • Read a poem for #InternationalPoetryCircle
  • Photo of the day
  • Get those stamps (task delegated to the husband, who is our designated shopper)
  • Start putting stamps on voter postcards
  • Write to at least one person
  • Dog walk

exercise walk is an important stretch goal, along with enjoy the sunshine (hope it lasts). Since it’s a workday, an added goal is to work well, so I’m off to do that now, ending this post quite abruptly, but not before…

Photo of the day

I actually took quite a few photos that I was happy with yesterday, including everything shown in this post. Here are two. The first one I like aesthetically, just a shadow on the sidewalk:

This one is my real choice for Photo of the Day because it’s the message I want to leave everyone with:

Recommended: Cop shows that entertain

A friend of mine recently crowdsourced a request for good police procedural shows to keep her entertained. This was before most of us had even heard the term “social distancing.” She’s a trailblazer. I’m a follower, and I love myself a good mystery or police procedural. So I’ve aggregated here the list of recommendations she received.

There are many shows on this list that I haven’t seen (hooray, more fun!) . So I’ve separated the ones I know and can recommend myself. You’re welcome. If you have other suggestions, throw them into the comments.

Let’s all stay entertained.

Cop shows and mysteries I’ve enjoyed

Here’s a book recommendation, too!
  • Longmire
  • River
  • Broadchurch
  • Shetland
  • Scott & Bailey
  • Giri/Haji
  • Comrade Detective
  • Endeavor
  • Foyle’s War
  • George Gently
  • Inspector Morse
  • The Blacklist
  • Harry Bosch
  • Miss Fisher Mysteries
  • Monk

Ones I haven’t seen

I can’t vouch for these personally, but friends of friends recommend them:

  • Luther
  • Mindhunter
  • Killing Eve
  • The Stranger (offered with the caveat that it takes a couple of episodes to establish itself, but is worth the wait)
  • Lincoln Rhyme
  • Hunters
  • The Killing
  • Unbelievable
  • Penny Dreadful
  • Paranoia
  • Vera
  • Brokenwood
  • My Life is Murder
  • Queens of Mystery

Podcasts

I haven’t listened to any mystery podcasts yet, but these recommendations made their way onto my friend’s list:

  • Dirty John
  • Doctor Death
  • Criminal
  • Casefile
  • The Drop Out

A few non-police recommendations

Again, I don’t know anything about these. They made their way into the crowdsourced recommendations despite not being (or so I understand) police or mystery shows:

  • Unbelievable
  • Ash vs. Evil Dead
  • Bodyguard
  • The Sinner
  • Black Mirror
  • Altered Carbon
  • Fleabag
  • You

Book recommendation

If you’re interested in the book recommendation, read more about about Girl Waits With Gun.